we all missed Casimir Pulaski Day.

at least we have Juneteenth to look forward to.

a couple thoughts for today...

I almost think it would've been better if I hadn't voted for prop 8, or if I'd voted no. because Christians are taking all the flack for it.

and rightfully so, I think.

the bigger question ought to be whether or not prop 8 should even exist. but maybe I'll develope that one a bit later on.

(I'm not going liberal on you, don't worry.)



also...

I think I'm going to add greg behle to my list of people I want to be.



and one last thing:

I'm no longer allowed to wear a beanie on a Tuesday or a Thursday. hold me to that.

sometimes I feel like I'm not the way people think I am. and I think that goes both ways.

I've done a lot of stupid things, these past few weeks. and a lot of things have happened, and I don't know if I'm directly or indirectly apart of any of it.

inevitibly, there are a lot of 'what if'sthat I try my best to avoid.


for example, there was an disciplinary incident recently that involved several people that I know - all of which had varying degrees of severity. sometimes I wonder if those kinds of things could've been avoided if I had taken more initiative in doing something. I don't know, though. I could never know that kind of thing, and it's not for me to dwell on - just for me to move ahead.

but it weighs in on me...


I'm leading a team out to jackson hole, wyoming, in a couple of days. I feel like all of the team organization and dynamics have just been catch-up from the get-go. now, I love the team - my coleader is awesome, and I'm really stoked about the trip.

but I can't help but to wonder (and I really can't help it) - did I play a direct role in how bumpy things have been up until now? and even now, there are what feels like a million steps to accomplish before we can leave on Friday. lately I've been dropping the ball in every area of my life, it seems. and I can't drop the ball on this - it's so big.

but it's calling into question every aspect of my leadership... and I'm thinking maybe I'm not the leader people think I am - maybe I only believed what other people have been affirming. I don't know.


needless to say... I'm having a hard time with myself, right now. and the worst part about that all is that I can't get away from myself, no matter how had I try. I wake up and I'm still right here with me, I leave and there I am , I go to sleep and I dream with me.

not too many of these blogs are really positive... or I feel like that's the way it is. I can't pretend that I haven't been messing up, though.



I've been doing so many more stupid things than I usually do... ah man. Lord, have mercy...

people that I want to be

"Remember your leaders, those who spoke to you the word of God. Consider the outcome of their way of life, and imitate their faith." Hebrews 13:7

1. Gunner Gundersen
2. Francis Chan
3. Eric Davis
4. Reverend Luvard Howard
5. Titus (from the Scriptures)
6. John Huss
7. Profesor Jim Owen

(and since someone asked, this isn't a final or exhaustive list)

Parachutes by Coldplay is still such a great album. so good for mornings. makes me miss my apartment... but just a little bit (I don't miss being 19)

I think I'm starting to get into my Micah mode of the semester, where I need like 3 alarm clocks to wake up in the morning.


this is from my New Testament Survey 1 notes, with Dr. Behle:

4. Sports
- Greek sports exalted human physique (Gymnasuim)
- Romans - more contact/blood sports, horse racing (Hypodrome)
- Jews avoided most sports, because of brutality & nakedness